You see, when it comes to sex and dating, men are creatures of the NOW. Ever tried to get a horny male to delay having sex for a few hours because there really isn’t time? …Or because you’re visiting your parents? Or because you’re in the mosh pit at a rock concert? Or for any other very good reason? You’re likely to hear this sort of response: “Wait until TONIGHT? Anything could happen between now and then – I could get hit by a bus, my penis could get injured, you could just decide you don’t want to anymore. Tonight may as well be never. It has to be now!”

Similarly, when we start dating you, it’s because we’re attracted to you NOW. Men don’t really factor in things like what you’ll look like in ten years, what sort of a mother you’ll make, or what you’d be like to live with. Hell, men don’t really factor in what it’ll be like to wake up next to you in the morning. Simple creatures, ain’t we?

For this reason, men are continually surprised when things about you or about the relationship do change, as they inevitably will. “Wow, you kind of have a lot of grey hair now – I wasn’t expecting that!”

This is especially true for sex.

Ok, this probably sounds ridiculous, but a lot of us convince ourselves that the early-relationship wherever/whenever 10-times-a-week sex is going to be a feature of our relationship with you for as long as we’re both physically capable of it.

Yes, this does lead to some disappointment.

Women, bless you all, seem to be able to think in terms that are a little more long-range when it comes to dating, sex and relationships. However, the problem with this is that women often ‘look into the future’ and make the mistake of thinking that their man will change (for the better!) once they start dating. Thus we have the popular refrain “I really thought I could change him”, which has been uttered by many, many a woman down through the centuries.

This is usually mission: impossible, because after the age of fourteen, men stay as much the same as they can possible manage to. In times past, men ‘grew up’ because they were forced to by their circumstances, or because it was an attractive option. Now, we can play Playstation, buy toys, have sex, drink, party, and risk our necks doing foolish things from early adolescence until our joints seize up, and many of us try to do just that.

There is one thing that really does change men though, and that’s fatherhood. Call us soft, but there’s something about those little guys (or girls) that might just make us agree to give up the motorbike and the base-jumping…at least until they’re older.

So there you go. If you really want a man to change, just have his baby! It’s that simple.

PR: wait… I: wait… L: wait… LD: wait… I: wait… wait… Rank: wait… Traffic: wait… Price: wait… C: wait…

Long distance relationships can be rough.  You’re totally into this person, but they live miles and miles away so you barely see each other.  There’s a limit to how comforting it is to talk on the phone or via Skype or to type *hugs* in an IM.  It’s just not the same when you want real hugs and can’t get them except from your cats, which is semi-pathetic since most cats don’t hug back (damn I stand corrected).

What’s awesome about a long distance relationship:

When you do see each other, it’s ON.  You cram in as much fun as possible into the time you have with each other.  The weekends you have together are amazing and the best sex you’ve had in your whole life.

You have a ton of freedom.  When deciding how to spend your evening / weekend / month, you don’t have to worry about the other person.  After all, you can call them from anywhere.

You don’t fight much, since you don’t really see each other a lot.

It’s a good way to test the trust and commitment level in your relationship.  If you don’t get jealous when your partner announces he’s going out to a party with a bunch of people, then you’re probably going to do pretty well in the long term.

What’s awesome about a short distance relationship:

You can build your level of intimacy since you’re together more often.  You have more time to experiment in the bedroom and find the best ways to please each other.

You’ll always have an activity partner who wants to be with you.

You will quickly find out the “little things” that annoy you about the person.  Does he always pee on the toilet seat? Is he annoyed when you use his razor to shave your legs, leaving it all dull and clogged with hair?  Can you survive living the rest of your life with this guy?

You’ll have the other person on a short leash if you don’t trust them!  (But seriously, if you don’t trust them, you shouldn’t be in a relationship with them.)

How to cope when things change

When your long distance love moves to town, you may first find yourself excited.  Finally!  They’re here!  You can have sex every day!  It’ll be totally freakin’ awesome.  And it is… at least at the beginning.  It’ll feel like an extended version of those amazing weekends you used to have together.

But eventually, it’ll start to feel like a regular ol’ normal relationship.  You’ll start to take each other for granted.  You’ll find things that really annoy you about the other person.  You’ll wonder if things were better when you didn’t see each other so often.  Did you waste all that time dating the person long distance when you’re really not compatible?

Don’t let this happen to you!  One of the things I’d strongly suggest is discussing some of the hard topics related to you your relationship BEFORE your long distance relationship becomes a short distance relationship.  The best way I’ve found to do this is by taking Adam & Sital’s Compatibility Test.

This is hands down the best way out there to have a good, open, honest discussion about key relationship issues before making this big step.  This test isn’t some cheesy, scale of 1-10 test you’d find in Cosmo.  It exposes those important elements of a relationship and will help you and your guy have an open discussion.

Once you take the compatibility test and discover you guys are actually compatible, just take a deep breath and hang in there.  You’ll be fine and your relationship will probably be stronger in the long run since you know for a fact you don’t have trust, commitment or compatibility issues!

What do you guys think? How hard is it to go from a long distance to a short distance relationship? What are some of the pro’s and con’s of each? Share you thoughts with us!