By now unless you are blind, deaf and have no friends, you have heard that Tiger Woods, the world’s #1 golfer and arguably the best golfer of all time was recently caught cheating on his wife Elin Nordegren.  There doesn’t seem to much dispute about whether or not he committed adultery, although how much adultery remains in question as woman after woman comes out of the woodwork to add to Tiger’s list of “transgressions“.

You know we here at U Say, I Say would have something to say about this, especially considering how much attention our Steve McNair debate generated.

So in light of the degree of the transgressions committed by Tiger, Sital and Adam debate the following question:

Will Elin Nordegren divorce Tiger Woods because of his cheating?

So read both Adam and Sital’s takes below, then log your vote.  We’ll send out the results in about two weeks time.

Liz believes that its time for them to break up and go their separate ways.  However, she is debating if she should bring up the fact that she cheated on Steve about a month ago.  She thinks it could help explain why they have been fighting so much, but is unsure if it’s too much information at this point.

Should Liz tell Steve that she cheated or just keep it to her self?

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Have you heard this one? “Honesty is the best policy.” Ah, no, it’s not. At least not always, and certainly not when it comes to people that you really care about. One of the justifiable reasons for not telling the whole truth, is to protect someone’s feelings, and this should apply to your girlfriend most of all! So don’t leap to the conclusion that just because you’re in a relationship the rule about not oversharing doesn’t apply.

Ok, without further ado, here are the top five things not to tell your significant other:

#1: Anything, anything at all, about your previous girlfriends

In general, guys get bent out of shape thinking about the people that their girl has slept with. For women it’s a little different – for them, it’s thinking about your previous serious relationships that might be painful. So don’t mention your previous girlfriends. At all. Seriously, nothing good can come of it.

Even saying something negative about an ex is a bad idea. First of all it just makes you look stupid, and second of all, whether it’s negative or not it’ll still conjure up a mental image of you with someone else, which is what you don’t want.

#2: All about that time you kissed a guy

It doesn’t matter that you were drunk, that it was a dare, that a lot of crazy stuff happened that night, that your frat brothers thought it was funny, or anything else. Whatever you say, all your girlfriend will hear is “I might be gay”, and from that point on she’ll be analyzing everything you do and say, no matter how trivial, that might add weight to the theory that you’re secretly longing to go out and get yourself a hot piece of man-flesh.

#3: That you’ve ever been with anyone who was better in the sack

Ok, you’re probably unlikely to ever blurt this one out, but you should also be careful that you don’t imply it either. Once you’ve put that mental image in her head, it’s going to stay there. Do yourself a favor, and steer well clear of this one.

#4: That you think her friends are idiots

It would be nice if we always got along with the other people in our significant others life. Unfortunately, it doesn’t always work out that way – just because they’re friends with yourgirlfriend doesn’t mean you want to hang out with them. But whatever the situation is, part of the deal of being with someone is to accept who they choose to hang out with, and to keep your opinions about them to yourself. This is not negotiable unless you have really good cause (for example, your girlfriend has a ‘friend’ who continually tries to bring her down).

#5: Where you hid the bodies

Heh – just kidding. Hopefully you’re not a serial killer. (If you are, errr…you should turn yourself in. Ok? Good.) But what this is about is telling (or rather, not telling) your gf about the things you’ve done that you’re maybe not proud of. The time you cheated on your ex would be in this category, as would the time you ripped off the company you used to work for, and the time in Vegas when you and your buddy got with the three lesbian dwarf strippers. Some things that are in the past are meant to stay in the past, so keep it that way and take this opportunity to reinvent yourself.

Our hope is that if YOU are faced with a similar experience, by listening to our guests, you gain a better idea of what may be going on the head of the person you’re dating and be better equipped to address the issue.

Here was the situation for this podcast:

Don is an attractive and fit 27 year old salesman that recently began dating Alora, an exotic-looking 30 year beautician.  Don and Alora have been hitting it off well and Don is confident that they are going to sleep together on their next date.  While Don is looking forward to sleeping with Alora, he is also concerned because he is not particularly well-endowed.  In fact, back in college Don had unflattering comments made about his manhood from random girls he hooked up with and would like to avoid that humiliation in the future.  This time around he is considering letting Alora know before they get busy that he isn’t particularly large and in charge.

Should Don warn Alora his battleship is more like a tugboat, or simply hope she doesn’t notice or doesn’t care?

Participants for this podcast were:

• Maxwell, a 28 year old software designer from Miami
• Ringo, a 26 year old freelance graphics designer from San Diego
• Penelope, a 30 year old attorney from Kansas
• Scott, a 25 year old salesman from Chicago
• Rajan, a 25 years old unemployed guy from Southern California

Click to Play: Click to Play: Don & Alora:  Should You Tell the Woman You’re Dating You Have a Small Penis?

Well don’t worry, because this article is NOT going to go there. That would be tired, lame and clichéd. No, this is going to an exciting treatise on the best response to the immortal question “so what do you think of my friends?”

Heh. Look, it’s not surprising that this issue of ‘what to say when you get asked something where an honest answer could get you in trouble’ has been around so long (I can imagine cavemen having to sleep outside after giving the wrong answer to “which makes my thighs look thinner, the leopard skin or the wolf fur?”) It’s a tricky issue, because it brings up age-old question of when it’s ok to lie to someone close to you.

Why do people lie at all?

Most of the time, people lie because, well, the truth hurts. Lies avoid this pain, and so lying is actually a vital social skill.

It smooths the waters, it papers over the cracks, and it keeps people happy. Research shows that people start being able to lie convincingly from the age of four and a half, and that pretty much everyone lies multiple times a day just so they can get through life with as little conflict as possible.

Think about this: when you were a kid, did your mom tell you to give an honest assessment of the cooking when your friend invited you around for dinner? No, she told you to say something nice, whatever you really thought. Smart lady!

Despite this, lying has gotten a bad rap, and that’s because there are really two kinds of lying, and the socially useful ‘white lie’ is not the one that gets all of the attention. There’s a world of difference between “I was at home watching TV on the night in question,” and “visiting your parents is exactly what I feel like doing this weekend, baby,” but when we think about lying we instantly think of the first example rather than the second.

So: Don’t feel too bad about telling your girlfriend the odd white lie – she’s almost certainly doing the same thing! Lying is common, and there’s no reason to think that our romantic partners exist in some sort of scrupulously honest parallel universe.

The truth is that people lie to their girlfriend or boyfriend just like they lie to their parents (“of course there won’t be any alcohol at the party”), their boss (“I put the report right on your desk – I guess the cleaner must have thrown it out”), the IRS (“I did not have any other income during the year”) and even their doctor (“I only ever drink in moderation”).

Telling white lies is ultimately a way of managing relationships and keeping people happy. As long as you’re not lying to cover up having done something really bad, it’s probably not worth losing sleep over it. And maybe in time you’ll actually start to like her friends!

What do you think? Is it ok to lie to your significant other? How regularly? Where do YOU draw the line?