What Everybody Ought to Know About The Role of Myspace and Facebook Early in a Relationship
July 5, 2009 by Rachel W.
Filed under Girls, Explained
Where would we be without our social networking sites? It started out as a great way to reconnect with high school and college classmates, old friends from the neighborhood you grew up in, and maybe (though you’d never admit it) as a way to spy on your exes.
Of course, now it’s devolved into a way to discover what country you should be living in, whether you REALLY know 80s TV sitcoms, and if you’re a good kisser. Oh, and you can bug your friends to join your mafia, be a vassal in your court, or help you find the purple polka-dotted egg to complete your collection.
But what do you do when you’re in a new relationship? What are these sites good for?
Spying on Their Past
As soon as your friend request is accepted, go through every wall post, every photo album, every everything about her. You will learn all sorts of things about your new girl toy, including the type of people she calls friends, the places she’s been, the things she deems worthy of a Mobile Photo Upload, and more!
You’ll probably also get some dirt about her past relationships, maybe even some pictures. Oh, and not to mention you’ll know if she should really be living in Kentucky or California and if she remembers what Alf’s home planet was (hint: She probably won’t if she was born after 1987, cradle-robber). These things are key to knowing if your relationship will last.
Sending Adorable Notes To Each Other
Early in a relationship, you’re in that phase where you’re trying to be as sickeningly adorable as possible. You want your friends to be jealous of the stuff that’s on your wall.
“Had a GREAT time last night – still exhausted… and a bit sore! Can’t wait to see you again!”
So then your buddies are IMing you wondering just WHAT happened last night and you get to gloat and keep information from them (or kiss and tell, whatever you happen to like to do). Either way, it’s a great way to be that couple everyone hates.
Keeping Tabs on Her
If your romantic interest is the type that constantly updates her Facebook status via their cell phone, you’ll know exactly where she is at all times, and with whom, and what they’re doing, and what they’re eating or drinking. You’ll also probably learn way more than you ever wanted to know (because seriously, some people are just excessive).
If you’re the jealous type and you’re paired with the Excessive Facebook Status Updater, it’s a match made in heaven. Hold on tight to this gem and you’ll keep each other happy.
Making It Official
It’s a big step, changing the relationship status on your profile. Especially with Facebook, since your profiles are linked together and everyone the two of you know will be notified in their News Feed with a tiny heart. No pressure there!
Plus there’s the question of making it “It’s Complicated” or “In a Relationship.” There’s always “In an Open Relationship.” Let’s go through these so you can make your decision:
It’s Complicated: Oh the mystery! What can it mean?? Good thing you asked. Here are a couple of meanings:
- You’re dating, but not exclusively yet.
- You’re dating, but the other person lives many moons away, so it’s practically like being single.
- You’re in an exclusive friends with benefits situation and want people to know to keep their filthy paws off your booty call.
- You’re probably getting divorced, but you’re not sure yet.
In an Open Relationship: You love her, but you’re not against sharing the love with other people. And by “the love” I mean “your body.”
In a Relationship: You’re for serious. Seriously. You’re not dating other people, you’re only dating her. You’re going steady (no class ring necessary).
Of course, once things get really serious, you have the options of “Engaged” and “Married.” But those are pretty obvious as far as definitions go.
You’re in the baby stages of a relationship, so get spying on her past, monitoring her future, and trusting the wisdom of the almighty Facebook quiz when it says you’re going to end up married, living in Kentucky, and having three girl babies.
How do you use Facebook & MySpace early on in relationships? How far do you go with your online stalking? Share your secrets and techniques!
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